actually, i do have other things to say but i fear they may be too intense. not that i'm adverse to saying intense things or even depressing things. but i like to be i a good enough frame of mind to gauge how much and how to phrase. today is not that day. so we'll save that for later.
so, i'm in the midst of a dilemma. see i don't really feel ready to have another child right now, more precisely i'm not ready to be pregnant right now. on the other hand, i'm pretty much out of time so time to fish or cut bait. and my relationship might not be in shape for it either but ya know; i've sorta come to the understanding that my destiny doesn't include that kind of petaled pathway.
wow. this is getting dark heavy anyway.
ya know the sad thing with this whole being fat thing is that i'm really not at the moment. i just look bad. ya can't squeeze an inch of fat on me except for my stomach. which brings me back to my post from a little bit ago - i need a boob job. i have taked to two other people who agreed with me on this. you have bigger boobs - your figure looks more hourglass so it's okay to have a little belly. maybe after the aforementioned possible baby to be i'll get some giant boobs. be easier than losing weight - apparently!
i have to plan my vacation - like now. i have some thoughts about going to michigan. and a rough plan to go to south carolina/north carolina/virginia. i have eight days to use before the end of march. and somewhere i have to squeeze in a second pogues concert. they are touring from march 4 until the 21 - maybe i should just take three weeks off.
so i suppose i should start putting a piece of poetry in every once in a while, huh?
It comes up on me; Sneaks up stealthy
Though Goddess knows, I’m not healthy
The gnawing and scratch;
The ache for more
Open the door
Can’t get enough
(Frickin whore)
Paste this hole
The piece someone stole
That I can’t find
Is it in my heart? or in my mind
alright kids - ya'll sleep tight - remember i love you and
Also . . . I can kill you with my brain
1 comment:
Come to Michigan. I'm not sure what kind of cool things we can do in this shitty weather, but if anything PY Stix is still here.
I think if you can still get pregnant when you want to then it is meant to be otherwise 1 kid is ok. I'm thinking 1 would have been ok for me. I'll let you know how 2 turns out.
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