often. very often. not always but frequently when i wake up or just as i'm falling off to sleep i find myself feeling like i am not myself. i think, what am i doing here. and by here i don't mean in my house or room or 'what am i doing with my life'. i mean here - inside this body. i think; this is not me. i haven't a clue how to explain this properly. when i was in kansas city; at the beginning of my nervous breakdown i had a conversation with barbara - my old roomate. first girl i kissed actually. anyway i was telling her that i had this nagging feeling like there was something that i forogt; something on the tip of my brain. that is very similar to this feeling that i am referring to. actually sometimes it happens just as a matter of course. during the day. i wish i knew what it was / is - thought i feel fairly certain it's spiritual. perpetual; there is something i should i be doing; if i only knew what.
so there's that. in other news my leg is all swelly which i am hoping is just because of my tevas. the strap i mean, hopefully i just had it too tight. but my leg is kinda whacky lately. sometimes i think it's getting better and sometimes i think it's declining.
david boreanaz' body is just well, it's ridiculous how hot he is. i'm gonna try to go to yoga tomorrow. i really have to pick up my schedule. but honestly i sorta seem to be lacking motivation in a number of ways. i was getting a lot accomplished until late august. and then there was the flea thing. it's just recently occurred to me that sublimating gideon's death has contributed heavily to my inertia. i just didn't see it because it started before his death. the whole flea thing just undid all the work i had done and so for a couple of weeks it was hard to get started again. and then gideon died. now, honest to goddess, when i say it didn't occur to me i mean until today. i kept thinking that i was just ahving a hard time starting up again. but duh.
i was doing some spells for a few weeks there but most of them were to remove fear or blockage etc. and i think i might just have flooded myself because i've been having a hard time with the part two of the spell.
well, that's all i got and i find myself exhausted yet again. maybe i will see you in your dreams
Also . . . I can kill you with my brain
7 comments:
Yoga is one of the basic means of reaching this altered state of consciousness.
And the altered state is the doorway to the occult. Sir John Eccles, Nobel Prize Winner for his research on the brain, said the brain is “a machine that a ghost can operate.'
In a normal state of consciousness one's own spirit ticks off the neurons in his brain and operates his body.
We are spirits connected with a body. But in an altered state, reached under drugs, Yoga, hypnosis, visualization, this passive but alert state, the connection between the spirit and the brain, is loosened.
That allows another spirit to interpose itself, to begin to tick off the neurons in the brain, and create an entire universe of illusion.
You've then opened yourself up to the spiritual realm which God forbids for us to enter. It's called sorcery.
Those encouraged to use meditation, yoga visualization, chakra energizing, Spirit guides could certainly take advantage of these open areas.
Repent, Cassdawn!
I -I'm a little taken aback by... never mind. I was distracted. Anyway, best to leave it alone.
Seems like maybe you need to see your leg specialist.
I feel like there is something I should be doing too, which is live my life in a way that didn't just pass the time, but I'm thinking you're talking about something different.
Kimber said...
Seems like maybe you need to see your leg specialist.
Seems like maybe you need to enter here,
Kimber!
LOL! Mickey makes me laugh. That made my night. I feel so special on top of the lol. I always wanted a stalker.
Was your father a stalker, Kimber?
lol - he's so weeeeeird!!!
And yes, before you ask, my father is weird too.
Did he abuse you, Kimmy?
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