dealing with some assclown at work.  which of course it isn't him.  i mean, it is in fact him - guy redefines douchebag.  my own personal theory is that if you are going to be a dick you shouldn't have the audacity to be stupid at the same time.  but whatever, the point is that of course i wouldn't be seething if not for the fact that he is the tiny tip of my iceberg.
with the exception of my son who is so much more and better than i deserve - the rest of my life seems to fall into varying degrees of not at all what should be happening.
now i'm a big believer in the idea that somehow or another it's my own damned fault but i can't figure that out for the life of me.  at the moment i am just really tired of this feeling of either being kicked around or taken for granted - i suppose there isn't much difference.  but i understand that position is not going to aid in resolving anything.  so i think maybe i will hit the bag a little and cry a bit - perhaps not in that order and then we'll see.  i have avoided spending too much time on this because i have begun to see it as futile but i suppose i'm gonna have to spend a little time with the question.
i don't think the whole neck, head, ear, runny nose thing is helping any.
 
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