I swear I once was pretty, not the monster you now see

you know how you have unfinished conversations with people. things you'll get around to saying or finish saying or clarifying. i don't have those. i'm not that kind of person. i don't have that much faith that there will be time. hell, i've probably destroyed relationships that way. but gideon and i had hundreds of unfinished conversations - some nearly 20 years old. i suppose i should stop talking about it but this is the only place that i do and i guess i keep thinking eventually i will say something that will allow me to put the whole thing to rest. so to speak - hehe. oh come on!! you were thinking it!!

we've taught our son to talk to the sun, moon etc. (to amuse ourselves we tell him to say "thank you mr. chicken" when he has his nuggets) so tonight he told the sun "goodnight. thanks for keeping the lights on :)" the idea of talking to the sun - us / that particular phrase and sentiment - all him.

quote from the tv show i was watching tonight "lie to me" - "research shows popular kids are the most facile they learn to adapt to hide their true feelings quickly that's what makes them so popular." i'm gonna have to look into that. it's interesting in a number of regards if it's true. but i think finding that out is going to take some very creative googling. what i did google / find out today is that the psychology of the show is apparently real - the studying of microexpressions. the doctor that the show is based on is apparently working on a visual lie detector test. how cool is that? or am i just a giant geek.

this is how i feel today- it starts 47 seconds in


`I swear I'll do things different but can't promise to be strong

so this is the weirdest thing - i just noticed a typo and went back to edit this and it highlighted words that weren't spelled wrong. i left one of them for you to see -the second "conversation" in the first paragraph i didn't correct. i let it correct the first one for me though. i don't see any difference between the two. am i going crazy or blind??

yep - did it again - even pointed out the words i let it correct last time - so bizarre.